Ear Wax

I'm married to a woman and I have a daughter. After 13 years being with my wife and many more years studying women, I thought I was beginning to understand this strange species of human. I was wrong.

Today I was in the office of a female colleague and I spied a receipt she had on her desk. It was for a "barberia". Even the name "barberia" freaks me out. The receipt said "Enjoy the convenience of waxing services at your hair appointment!".

Enjoy the experience? Doesn't waxing include pouring hot liquid on your skin and then excruciatingly ripping the hair out of your body?

Even worse, the menu included:

• Brow Design $20
• Brow Maintenance $15
• Chin Wax $20
• Ear Wax $20
• Hairline Wax $20
• Hand/Finger Wax $20
• Lip Wax $20
• Lower Arm Wax $35
• Sideburn Wax $20

There are so many things wrong with this list of "services" I don't even know where to begin. First of all, I clean my ears every day. And I never have to pay for it. No wonder I don't understand women, they're so different they're actually putting wax into their ears.

Bizarre.

And what about this Lip Wax? Lips? Even whilst traveling in Eastern Europe, home to alot of hairy women, I've never seen any with hair on their lips.

What's going on here?

And I live in San Francisco. This is Metro-Sexual Male central. The other day I was in a meeting with a guy from Salesforcedotcom and his glasses matched his pen. Now that defines the term Metrosexual. But even he doesn't get his sideburns waxed. So who are the people ordering these services?

But I have a theory that solves a number of outstanding issues:

Unwaxed women are actually Sasquatch!