Running for office

I was reading about an uproarious event which recently took place in Florida. Apparently, there is a chicken problem in the Sunshine State.

High Springs, Florida. “ After seeing High Springs firefighters toting rifles through a neighborhood and shooting at chickens last week, residents said they are infuriated.

The southwest sector of town between Southwest Fourth Avenue and Poe Springs Road has had a chicken problem for years. Many residents said they were upset not that the chickens were killed but the manner in which the situation was handled.

Residents said they were not notified that the shooting would happen, that they worried about the safety of their children and pets, and that firefighters ran through private property without permission.

When the shooting was over, residents said they were left to deal with injured chickens and a bloody mess.”

This reminded me of when my uncle stated his intent to run for mayor in Grand Marais, Minnesota. His stated intent was to run on a platform that would definitely have appealed to the rifle-toting firefighters in High Springs, Florida.

I’ve previously written about this certain hippie uncle as he was the one that taught me about the extreme sport of moose riding.

As I recall, his platform for mayor consisted of being able to effectively and humanely remove the “geese problem” from the cities litany of woes, although Grand Marais is probably only a township. But his platform and solution was certainly unique: to send the hockey team out on rollerblades and with their sticks. Being fast and aggressive, I’m sure they would’ve made short work of the Canadian geese that were menacing the township.

His running mate, an electrician, was chosen because he could easily explain “where all that electricity goes when the plug’s not in the wall”. An important set of knowledge indeed.

So if the bird-flu pandemic ever hits, you know who to call.