My Neck Is Fat

Today I was preparing for a professional photographer to take my picture. My preparations included simple things like putting on a shirt. Simple, one would think, but somewhere along the lines, my neck seems to have grown quite dramatically.



Now this is odd as just recently I had my neck measured for a new set of shirts I purchased. But nonetheless, today when I tried to button my top button, it was as though I was about to become Exploding Head Man. After struggling with the top button, I looked in the mirror and it looked as though someone had placed a tomato onto my new shirt.



Now how this could possibly happen is but a mystery and I forgot about the whole incident. Then I got to the photography shop, button undone and hidden below my skillfully tied tye, and I sat for a series of pictures. Even the photographer thought they looked good as he said "you have a nice smile".



But then he added "it should only take an hour or two of Photoshop work to touch up these photo's". An hour or two? I don't think they took that long to touch up Abu Musab al-Zarqawi after the US dropped a couple 500 pound bombs on the guy.



This obviously has something to do with my neck problem.