Thomas Jefferson Was A Moose Riding Hippie!

My uncle is a hippy. A long-haired, former-drug-using, commune living, Norton motorcycle-riding, real-life, honest-to-goodness, hippy. Since being retired from the drug-use and communal living scene, he pretty much lives in the woods, hunting and fishing, and generally enjoying life.

He is the person who introduced me to the exteme sport of moose riding. And being from Moose Lake, Minnesota, this is an extremely interesting and important sport.

Right up there with hockey.

The key tenant of moose riding is that the only safe way to ride a moose is while they are swimming. Otherwise, you may just be considered for the Darwin Award for just being stoopid. But before you begin to fancy the competitive sport of moose-riding, a few moose facts:

• MOOSE ARE VERY BIG ANIMALS. Bulls weigh between 800 and 1200 pounds. Cows are somewhat smaller, usually weighing between 500 and 900 pounds, and have no antlers.
• MOOSE LIVE FOR A LONG TIME. Cow moose have been known to live for as long as 20 years. Bull moose may reach 15 years of age.
• MOOSE ARE GOOD SWIMMERS. Moose readily take to the water. Aquatic plants are a favorite food.
• MOOSE CAN BE AGGRESSIVE. Avoid Confrontations.
• DOGS AND MOOSE DON’T MIX.
• CARS AND MOOSE DON’T MIX. During 1987 and 1988, in Newfoundland, there were 661 motor-vehicle accidents involving a moose.
• MOOSE HAVE BODY LANGUAGE: If they charge you, run away, and always maintain an escape route.
  

Thomas Jefferson was an admirer of moose -- so much so that he took a moose to Paris as a kind of advertisement for the New World. My conjecture is that he rode that moose to Paris.

And he had long hair!